So as we start out Sexuary I want to put out there one of the 'me' things that I've come to grips with. I'm male, and I love anal. Yes I love giving anal, and the feel of taking Jackie for a 'backyard BBQ' will send me over the top every time, but that's not what I'm talking about. I've allowed myself to admit that having something up my ass is ....exhilarating....breath taking...multi-orgasmic....unfucking believable.
Over the last year or so I've over come the negatives of a man wanting something anal. Let's face it, most guys would just tell you they're not 'gay' and 'don't touch my ass, that's gay'. HA! The joke is on them. They have no clue what it means to have their prostate rubbed from the inside.
I don't remember exactly how it started with Jackie and I. I know I've always had some interest in anal play, but normally I left that for me getting to claim the woman. But I remember once while Jackie was playing she hit my perineum (that little pea size ball between your sack and the base of your cock) and I came so hard it wasn't even funny. I'd never experienced anything like that. It wasn't long after that we were playing and she fingered my ass and found my prostate for the first time. I think it's the first time I've ever said that was enough. I had multiple orgasms that were so intense I thought I was going to pass out if she didn't stop. I was sold on anal play from that moment on. But there was still a naggling tug that it wasn't right. It was wrong for me to like anal.
So last Sexuary we went to an extreme. If possible, and honestly after a couple of test runs we honestly weren't sure, I wanted to be fisted. We had purchased a life size hand dildo and an anal plug that was every bit as round as the hand but had never gotten either of them inside of me. During Sexuary I was determined that if it could happen I was going to feel that fullness from fisting. Jackie said I had to mentally let go first. I'm not sure how much of that is true, but she's probably right, mentally I had to let that hand slip into my ass before it would physically go in.
Almost every day for a week Jackie attempted to fist me...then on that wonderful day it made it past the barriers and I was once again in heaven. It was heaven, with the added benefit of afterwards for hours my whole body had a calm, peaceful, unbelievable feeling of tranquility. It took us a couple more months and Jackie was actually able to get her fist (definitely a bit larger than the dildo, though not toooo much), inside of me. A real fisting with a real hand. A new level reached. A new level of peace.
So where am I going here? Well it's about 'me'. You see if I listened to everyone else I probably never would of tried all the anal I have. Without it I never would have had the best orgasms of my life! Nothing has ever made me cum harder or more often than anal. I've been blessed to have a wife that will indulge me in my 'kink'. It's not her thing, but she knows that I need things and this is one she does for 'me'. Ok, I think it's a bit more her thing now then when we started, but it will never be 'her' thing.
So what's your thing? What is that one thing you have wanted for yourself that maybe you were afraid to ask about? Or something you like but never get? It doesn't have to be sexual, maybe it's an hour to yourself to meditate or work out at the gym. Maybe it's a book you've always wanted to read. For me, it's some fun sex things. ;) Why would those other things be part of Sexuary? If you can't feel good about yourself, if you can't do the things you want, if you can't be happy where you are, then there is no way you can be happy with a mate, with your children, with yourself. I know I'm more relaxed and more satisfied now that I've allowed myself this.
Dane
PS, want more on Sexuary 2014? Head to www.welcometomybrain.net
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